Things that needed to be improved - Feedback received 16/10/11
- The problem needs to be established quicker. The problem wasn't clear enough.
- How will the audience know that the wooden structure is the lifeboat house?
- More emotion needs to be presented.
- What is the pivotal emotion in the story?
- What POV will be the most effective to shoot from?
- Make it a birthday instead of an anniversary so the situation becomes more empathetical.
- Increase the emotional tension between mother and daughter.
- I have change the mothers name to 'Mary', in relation to the boat - The Mary Stanford, and that its better suited to time and place.
